dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
