My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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