bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
