Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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