Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
