The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
this must be what syphilis tastes like
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize