Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
