I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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