now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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