Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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