butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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