I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Found the puke drawer
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
