D3 body, D1 cock
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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