lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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