We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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