It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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