There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
