i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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