Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize