I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
