I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize