I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
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