I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
