theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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