redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Couch. On fire.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
