yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
