she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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