it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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