I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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