Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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