Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
