Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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