well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
