Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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