New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize