She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize