big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
