Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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