i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I have demons in me.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
