I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
