why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
