Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
