You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
