I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
