You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize