i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize