you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
