you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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