If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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