Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
