walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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