i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
